This spread formed in my mind while I was in a Tarot class, listening to the instructor talk about the 10 of Wands. Thankfully it was an online class and I could hit the pause/replay to write this down before inspiration and the moment passed. We don’t want any Xanadu incidents if we can avoid them.
The Butthurt Princess Tarot Spread is very straightforward. We all have those “10 of Wands” moments in life when we need to be lovingly but firmly told that we are indeed, being self-absorbed turds and that our problems are 100% our own. This spread is useful when:
1. You feel stuck in a particular rut but also paralyzed to move forward, especially if you blame someone else for your paralysis: “I can’t take a job transfer because my wife will never leave Pleasantville. Therefore it’s her fault that my career is grinding to a halt.”
2. You are constantly playing the oppressed martyr: “I’m the one who carries this company/this relationship.”
3. You are bright enough to realize that you are getting in your way but not sure exactly how or what to do about it.
Use all the cards in the deck and repeat this spread as often as necessary until you stop being so butthurt.
The positions are:
1. The situation as it is, not as you want to see it. This is the blunt reality check.
2. A, B, and C: What you’ve done to contribute to your current state of crapulence.
3. A, B, and C: What others have done to contribute to your current state of crapulence. These cards could speak about specific people or outside events.
4. Where/How in this issue you are being a butthurt self-absorbed princess.
5. Where will things likely go if you don’t change your behavior/ get out of your way?
6. Where will things likely go if you stop being a butthurt princess who needs to control everything?
7. Bottom of the deck: this is the underscore, the background energy. I find the bottom of the deck tends to sum everything up and give you a cornerstone from which you may proceed.
